I
always thought this word described something that was earned. A sincere and genuine sentiment inspired in
us by another. I Respect Rafael Nadals
ability to hold his own, even on clay, against the rising talent of Novak
Djokavic despite the latter’s apparent talent dominance in men’s tennis at the
moment. I respect him because he still able to win quite often, even though
arguably outgunned. It shows a certain
mental quality that I recognize, admire and possibly even envy.
I’m
sure the above is a simple enough statement and an understandable sentiment. It’s what I feel rightly or wrongly, so I can
state it freely. Nobody should be able
to hold your true feelings against you, even though they can perhaps moderate
how you express them if there is a danger they may harm others.
What
is to be the appropriate reaction then, to a screaming politician like former
youth league leader Julius Malema demanding respect but not showing it? What about a terrorist organization demanding
respect for the Prophet Mohammed, and threatening death to those daring to
render his image in cartoon or otherwise?
How much respect can be shown to someone’s symbol when they have made
clear their reciprocal value on your life?
Can
respect be demanded or even requested?
Can it only be earned? What is
the feeling out there?
In
terms of our cultural identities and the inherited ritual and ceremony inherent
in them, there are two aspects to re-individualizing or freeing ourselves. The first aspect is severing the ties that
currently bind us to a value system. The
second is finding and knowing ourselves, developing the self awareness to get
in touch with that part oneself that makes us an individual.
Let’s
look at the first aspect, severing the ties.
What holds us back?
I seriously put forward
that respect, unnecessary respect, is corrupting our ability to recognize ineffectual
and outdated value systems, and holding us tied to them because respect is seen
as an absolute noble quality with context and application largely misunderstood
and ignored.
What happens if we experiment with the context and application to highlight true motives of control and hypocrisy inherent in them?
Let’s
look at religion in particular, a huge cultural identifier.
I
propose that you cannot possibly respect somebody if you have to pretend to
respect their unrealistic beliefs in order to keep the peace. You can only show respect to them if you feel
free in front of them to express to them that you feel their beliefs are out of
touch with reality, but that you respect and defend their right to believe what
they want, as long it does not infringe on the rights of others, surely?
As
an atheist/agnostic whatever your definition requirements are, I seldom receive
this “respect” in return for my lack of belief in a supernatural creator from
the religious, only requests to respect their particular deity/dogma. I’m often called cowardly or a “Fence Sitter”
(illogically if you think about it). Why respect is typically only expected to work this way
around is a mystery, why can’t I be the one getting offended if I am made to
say “grace” or whatever, just out of some sort of expected manners protocol?
I say poor manners the other way around rather by expecting me to do it!?
The
consequence of embarrassment should be felt by person that believes in magic
and want to have it seriously put forward as an option for everyone, not by the
reasonable person who relies on evidence and tangible sensory perception? Why get embarrassed by offending people who
are choosing to take offence by restricting your freedom of expression?
They
are free to pursue their beliefs, but I respect them too much as a person to
respect their supernatural beliefs and I would rather engage in occasional healthy
honest debate if they require it, than avoid them a permanent basis because I
threaten their particular delusion and I have to pussyfoot around the topic in
case I offend.
Nobody
has the right to take offense if you speak about how you feel in a way that is
not insulting. I can think religion is
absurd and still have religious friends, I can think lime milkshake is
revolting and still have friends that drink it. I do not think they are absurd or revolting. We need to learn to not confuse our issues,
that’s where respect comes into the picture honestly.
Viva
la difference, lose the fear and ditch the unnecessary respect, cut the first
tie that binds!
This
is the first freedom we take for ourselves, nobody will give it to you, and you
need to take it!